UPSB v4
Temporary Bin / Social Approval
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Date: Fri, Nov 16 2012 06:08:16
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Date: Fri, Nov 16 2012 06:43:56
I love how you return just to post your social commentary.
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Date: Fri, Nov 16 2012 06:53:53
People always want what they can't have. Its human nature. It pretty much explains the whole, "Hey, he's in a relationship, I want him" sort of thing. For the people that are single, their chances are dimmed because the subconscious thought (mainly for women, or so i think) is "He's single, he's open whenever I want. Let me go after something a little harder." That "something that is a little harder" is a taken guy or girl.
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Date: Fri, Nov 16 2012 12:24:37
dafuq? I'd never even think of touching the girl of a bro. Anyone who does that is a faggy douche.
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Date: Fri, Nov 16 2012 13:40:10
the path you describe is sort of an "optimal" path the majority of people should take. through trials and errors, people have learned to adjust to the current societal model and found out that if the majority of people take this path, it results in a functional society. you are free to become an outsider and do whatever you want, but the majority of people should still follow this path.
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Date: Fri, Nov 16 2012 14:39:54
yeah I agree with Zombo here, it may not be an "ideal" life style but you aren't going to go too wrong with it either. I always think about it like an RPG, most charcters gotta be NPCs, if you don't want to be an NPC you gotta take risks but thats not always an enjoyable thing to do. @Tialys What have you done to go against this social model in your life? Or do you accept that you too are a person and follow the same trends?
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Date: Fri, Nov 16 2012 17:14:43
Very good Tialys, but you read too much into what is going on. This is my analysis. You get into a relationship. You think this person is AWESOME (otherwise, why the hell would you be in a relationship with them). You put them in your profile picture to 'show them off'. This person is awesome and look, they are with me!
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Date: Sat, Nov 17 2012 04:47:39
Mats wrote: You put them in your profile picture to 'show them off'. This person is awesome and look, they are with me!
No way. There's much more to it than that. You may be right in some cases, but I'm also very certain people do it for other reasons such as: -[in]security -societal approval -superficial showing off I actually see white people doing this way more than Asian people. Though if do I see an Asian girl do it, it's to show off her white boyfriend, this goes back to the whole insecurity thing, "I can't stand being a minority, I need the dominant race's cock! Look I'm normal now that I got a white guy!" On a somewhat related side note, one of the worst things Western society has imposed on people is the normality of having a girlfriend. With all the >tfw no gf posts on /r9k/, it's undeniable that people see having a girlfriend as an achievement and way to be a part of society. Having a girlfriend will not magically make your life bliss and buff your self esteem. That people actually believe this is a huge problem. Consequently, this ties into the divorce rate. With so many people dating, people are inclined to think they should marry their significant other after dating for a couple years - a huge logical fallacy because girlfriend material is most certainly not wife material (read: T&A vs. having actual values/ability to run a household with someone else). And most guys can't pick out a good girlfriend in the first place so you can see where the problem starts. -
Date: Sat, Nov 17 2012 04:52:06
the whole profile + wall + tweets thing in general is meant to be attention-seeking, thats the whole point, i dont see a reason to specifically target one aspect of it (relationships), if you're gonna rant, you have to rant about it as a whole.
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Date: Mon, Nov 19 2012 03:43:08
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Date: Mon, Nov 19 2012 10:25:37
First of all. Remind me to NEVER drink with you.
Tialys wrote: In regards to social media, one predictable trend I've noticed is that someone who is in a relationship tends to include his significant other in his profile picture, and if it's a girl then it's almost guaranteed. [COLOR="red"]No and nor does my GF of 4.6 years[/COLOR] I reasoned that someone who readily identifies him/herself by his/her relationship status does so to seek social approval. We live in a society where being taken is portrayed as more desirable to being single. Maybe this attitude made sense at one time when finding a mate was vital to propagating the species, but now it's no longer necessary. And so people can't help themselves from announcing "look at me, I'm not single!" Why else would you identify yourself through your relationship with someone else? I think there is a lot to be said for being secure in your individuality. As a side note, 50% of marriages fail and yet people keep jumping into them impulsively. Marriage is merely one part of the regimented structure of life that society espouses: - go to grade school - get good grades and be admitted to college/university - graduate - break into a career/pay off student loans - climb corporate ladder - get married - take out a mortgage - have children - raise them until they leave - retire I won't say that society rewards mediocrity but it's obviously not opposed to it, either. You can live a fulfilling life without having to follow what everyone else does. I think a lot of people understand this but are too scared to take risks and go against convention. I'll stop here before I go too off-topic. I guess that's what I get for drinking before posting. Thoughts?
What Zombocom said, everything we do is to show off. We try to be unique and stand out in a world of billions. That, is probably the only thing we all as a society have in common. -
Date: Mon, Nov 19 2012 10:55:42
How much is .6 of a year anyway? Who keeps track that accurately?
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Date: Tue, Nov 20 2012 05:27:05
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Date: Wed, Nov 21 2012 02:51:37
Mats wrote: How much is .6 of a year anyway? Who keeps track that accurately?
I sure as hell don't. I was just curious what a more accurate decimal value was. 2 second math solved that mystry =) Posted from a fone. -
Date: Wed, Nov 21 2012 10:43:34
Tialys wrote: I said it was a common trend, not that everyone did it. Congrats on the long relationship. [COLOR="red"]Thank you.[/COLOR]
.Had I been wiser in my youth, I probably would have considered post-secondary education more carefully instead of just taking it to be a natural extension to high school. I would have focused more on earning job experience and the skills required to succeed in the workplace. I don't plan on climbing any corporate ladder but aspire to someday work for myself. [COLOR="red"]FINALLY! Some sense. This is exactly why I am slacking off in school. I'm already set for my career and haven't even graduated. It works.[/COLOR] Even if the opportunity presents itself, I don't plan on getting married until I feel satisfied with where my personal and professional life is heading. Although I'm fine with being single, too. [COLOR="red"]This is actually quite normal and actually encouraged in Asian culture.[/COLOR] I'll have to get back to you once I've taken action, right now I don't yet have the opportunity. I'm always learning and will probably not have a complete perspective until many years have passed. Right now I believe a truly fulfilling life boils down to: 1) The ability to release yourself from expectations of others and yourself. 2) The ability to realize your own value and happiness regardless of whether you are single or married, are eking out a living or are wealthy, and several other things. 3) The ability to overcome the fear that holds you back from pursuing your calling. I've never heard of people who went for it, failed, and regretted trying. But I have heard of people who regretted the missed opportunity to go after something they love. [COLOR="red"]This is what you were taught in grade school. To be yourself, to he happy with yourself etc etc. This is is what society wanted from you, to want to be different is to be normal.[/COLOR]Spoiler
[B]Aside:[/B] From a young age we are inculcated with beliefs revolving around a predetermined life path. One's parents learn from their parents, and so on, transmitting the mores of a particular society generationally. These values also become standards that our contemporaries tacitly uphold. Practically speaking, bucking convention is difficult. First you have to reprogram yourself by undoing the conditioning received in childhood. Then you will likely have to deal with disapproval from others. I'm not saying you have to purposely break the mold. I'm saying that people are better off taking control of their own life and establishing their own identity, whether or not it falls in line with the expectations of others. Instead I see people discarding their personal interests in favour of what essentially amounts to social status. -
Date: Wed, Nov 21 2012 23:43:21
Tialys wrote: 1) The ability to release yourself from expectations of others and yourself. 2) The ability to realize your own value and happiness regardless of whether you are single or married, are eking out a living or are wealthy, and several other things. 3) The ability to overcome the fear that holds you back from pursuing your calling. I've never heard of people who went for it, failed, and regretted trying. But I have heard of people who regretted the missed opportunity to go after something they love.
I don't think this applies to everyone. In fact, it may not apply to that many people at all. For example, for myself: 1) My expectations for myself are the main driving force that keep me going. Achieving lofty expectations I set for myself is a source of great life satisfaction for me and meeting the challenges of other is pretty darn good too. 2) Somewhat agree. 3) I had no fear of this to overcome to start with. -
Date: Thu, Nov 22 2012 01:07:50
@Tialys You want to be different so much but at the same time you follow the same routines to deal with depression as countless others have. Some people post pictures on facebook some people post rants on pen spinning boards. Its all insane and we are all stupid; so don't judge others because they are probably going through the same difficulties as you are. EDIT:
I've never heard of people who went for it, failed, and regretted trying. But I have heard of people who regretted the missed opportunity to go after something they love.
This is a factor of pride, people who went for something they love will paint in a positive light and thus invoke happy emotions. People can also invoke sympathy through the "I had potential but didn't try" cliche. In musical terms its just whatever music fits the message rather than what the activity actually was. -
Date: Mon, Dec 3 2012 23:51:17
I've been thinking about this since I last responded. At first I sought to understand why people act in predictable ways, based on things such as social approval. I cited the profile pictures as an example and gave my interpretation of it. But then I was forced to admit that this behaviour bothered me on some level, because if I didn’t care about it then I probably wouldn’t mention it. Even though my intent was not to judge, I can now see how this attitude comes through in the original post. The thing is, nobody is required to justify a particular worldview that they hold (within reason). I don’t feel there is any “correct” way that one should live, only suggested ways. I think it’s important to find your own path, but I won’t judge someone who thinks otherwise. Yes, posting stuff like this on a PS message board makes no sense. I should probably blog about it instead. [B]So why don’t we throw this thread into the recycling bin? I no longer think it’s adding anything to the Serious Discussion forum. [/B]
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Date: Sun, Dec 9 2012 16:10:24
Tialys wrote: [B]So why don’t we throw this thread into the recycling bin?[/B]
Ahem... mods? :)